There is a saying I hear all the time:
“If you don’t love yourself, how can you love anyone else?”
I know it’s a popular quote, but I’ve never completely agreed with it.
In fact, I think a different question might be more helpful:
If you can’t love yourself, how can you accept love from anyone else?
Because “don’t” implies a choice.
Sometimes it isn’t a choice at all.
Sometimes life has handed us enough criticism, heartbreak, loss, and self-doubt that loving ourselves feels more complicated than we would like to admit.
Yet many of those same people love others deeply.
I’ve seen it countless times.
People who struggle to see their own worth often have no trouble seeing the worth in everyone around them.
The challenge isn’t always giving love.
Sometimes the challenge is believing we deserve to receive it.
But first a nap 